Beautiful Between

living fully in the now & not yet

How to live a richly beautiful life: 3 simple ingredients

There’s a painful space between what is and what should be, between hope’s conception and fulfillment. We live in this gap with the tension of unfulfilled dreams. The heartache of loss. The sickness of deferred hope. Life isn’t quite what we expected. We’re longing for wholeness or relationships or children, mending grief or marking time in kitchens and cubicles. Amidst soul […]

If you feel like you’re not enough, this is for you

I wanted to talk about when you feel like you’re not enough. I wanted to tell you how I cope and struggle against the innate sense of lack so many of us carry. But as I wrestled with the words, something inside pushed back. As a kid I thought about hiding on recess as a […]

When you’re missing the beauty and just need to breathe

He got on one knee on the lakeshore, holding my hands and my heart. His words were loving and kind; his eyes saw into me deeply. “These past nine months have been the hardest, most redemptive and most restorative of my entire life. I want to spend all of this life and the next loving […]

My body wouldn’t break…so I couldn’t heal

girl sitting on curb

“I’m fine,” I say. I’m regaining consciousness. I feel the heat rising from the blacktop and the sun beating down. My head feels full of sloshing liquid. A panic starts to rise in my chest, a shuddering heartbeat and a trembling in my limbs, but I shut it out. I imagine a door slamming shut […]

The Story I Promised to Tell You

2016 caught me off guard – an unexplained illness early in the year kept me in bed for weeks as winter faded to spring. Somewhere along the way, that illness developed into a numbness, then a shadow, then a shaking. Depression and anxiety found me after a long absence. So 2016 was also the year […]

Why Faithfulness Sometimes Looks Like Stillness

All the paths of the Lord are steadfast love and faithfulness… Sometimes paths of steadfast love and faithfulness lead through dark valleys and places of pain. Sometimes we must give up, relinquish control, simply let go at the worst possible time. Sometimes there is little light at the end of the tunnel, save for what […]

How I Found Surprising Grace in Paris – Part 2

How I Found Surprising Grace in Paris Part 2

Chateau Chenonceau. Photo Credit: Jonathan Perrinet via Compfight cc I only had Him. And He met me there, sweetly and unexpectedly. (Note: This is the second part to the story I started last week about finding surprising grace in Paris. Click here to read part one.) Early April had left me lonely and longing for connection. Parts […]

How I Found Surprising Grace in Paris – Part 1

Dear friends, I want to tell you a story that’s sweet to my soul. Eight years ago, I was in Paris, having my heart and soul rearranged under the gracious hand of my Father. I had no idea what those ten weeks would do to me then, but now I know the lessons learned and […]

The Precious Gift of Friends Like Family

friends like family

I’m sitting in a quiet house at Steve and Lindsey’s kitchen table. They’ve gone to work and the kids are at school; this is my last morning here. It’s been beautiful. We are accidental friends. Steve mistakenly found his way somewhere he shouldn’t be online, a private group I was in. When he shared his […]

Stuck in the Middle: The Secret to Waiting Well

This is the part no one talks about. The hours, days and weeks both the director and the writer skip over. There is a reason that stories and movies jump from one scene to the next. No one wants to see the boring parts of the story, even if they are important. If the camera […]