Beautiful Between

living fully in the now & not yet

This is what you need to know if the darkness never lifts

I sat at a stoplight, trembling with anxiety’s rattle and hum. The sky was bleak with charcoal clouds seemed to mirror my soul. The familiar fog of depression had rolled in and I was weary of the struggle. It was exhausting: wrestling to be whole, never shaking the bone-deep loneliness. The fog formed a dense […]

I love Jesus but I want to die: what you need to know about suicide

I was in California on a business trip, just yards from the beach, eating ice cream and laughing as the conversation drifted away from business. Eventually, somebody mentioned a friend-of-a-friend who had died by suicide. The familiar ache and nausea filled my chest. My insides rattled when my coworker said he didn’t understand what would […]

After one year, this is why I REALLY love my husband

Micah makes me laugh. He cares for me better than I have ever cared for myself, better than anyone has ever cared for me. He is my complement in so many ways, sturdy and stable in the face of my deeply felt emotions. He is more than everything I’d hoped. There is so much I […]

You are delightful. But you need to learn to see.

I found joy for the first time 10 years ago in a perfect, Parisian spring.  Paris is every bit as magical as you’ve heard, but perhaps not in all the ways you’d expect. It’s still a filthy, crowded urban area. Traffic is ridiculous and there are homeless people in desperate need of help and racial […]

Are we missing something big about the cross?

missing-something-about-the-cross

It was like hearing the old story for the very first time, there in that makeshift Welsh church. I was living in Paris and it was quintessential spring, with cherry blossoms on the Champs-Elysee and girls in sundresses laying out in the parks. Ten years ago and just like yesterday, you know? But despite the […]

When you need a reminder your life is here and now

I’m not quite sure how time has slipped by me. It’s been three weeks since I’ve written you; it’s far too long. I knew what I wanted to say in January: we talked about becoming who we want to be and forming the habits that will get us there. Then February came like a whirlwind. […]

God With Us: Behold

Today, we remember the day that God put on skin. It’s in every corner of the story, the crimson thread that runs with astonishing consistency. He’s coming for the broken, the shamed, the burdened, the unknown. Reading: John 1:1-18, 1:29 Song: Behold the Lamb of God and The Theme of My Song by Andrew Peterson […]

God With Us: The Unwanted

Unreliable. Liars. Thieves. Unclean. The words echo, but not across the dark field. The words are inside, and the shepherds can’t escape. They’re caked with the grime of their work and a stigma that’s never quite washed away. /// Reading: Luke 2:8-20 and 4:18-19 Song: While Shepherds Watched Their Flocks by Andrew Peterson* ///   […]

God With Us: In Labor

Long months have passed. The wait is almost over. She’s kept Elizabeth’s words tucked in her heart, pulling them out when she needed them: “You are blessed, blessed for believing the Lord would fulfill His promises to you.” Reading: Luke 2:1-7, Matthew 11:28-30 Song: Labor of Love by Andrew Peterson /// Mary never imagined the […]

God With Us: In the Tension

The promises have been spoken. There’s a child coming, and something great beyond understanding is underway. Reading: Today, there is no reading.We’re in between the announcements and the fulfillment. We’re sitting in the tension, so let’s take a moment to reflect. Whatever connected with your heart, take some time to remember God is with you […]